Divorce Counseling: Should you try it?

Divorce is a life-changing decision that can result in many different emotions and obstacles presenting themselves, even when the proceedings are over. Just because the marriage is over on paper, doesn’t mean that the communication between you and your spouse is going to be done as well, especially if you have children. Therefore many people seek the help of a divorce counselor to help them navigate through their divorce either while they are going through the process, or when it’s over.

We’re going to explore divorce counseling, how it can help, and some tell-tale signs that you may want to seek it.

What is Divorce Counseling?

Divorce counseling can give you the skills you need to handle difficult discussions with your ex and make decisions effectively. Through divorce counseling, people learn how to handle their emotions and deal with conflict constructively. Communication skills can deteriorate even further during divorce which is why some people choose to go through divorce counseling with their exes.

If people choose to go through divorce counseling once a divorce has been finalized or agreed upon, it can help both parties begin to find their way through. It can also help parents talk to their kids about divorce and try to work through their divorce civilly.

Once the divorce is final, divorce counseling can still be helpful as it can provide guidance when it comes to any conflicts surrounding the children or any other ongoing concerns. It can also help parents when it comes to the logistics that often need sorting when kids are involved.

Signs You May Need Divorce Counseling

If you and your spouse can’t agree when it comes to divorce issues or if you notice more conflict, you may benefit from divorce counseling.

There may also be red flags when it comes to your emotional and mental well-being that may be improved through divorce counseling.

These signs can include:

  • Changes in sleeping habits
  • Depression
  • Decreased energy
  • Weight changes
  • Loss of appetite
  • Difficulty focusing

If you notice any of these signs in yourself or someone else notices them and brings them to your attention, you may want to seek help from a divorce counselor.

How Can Divorce Counseling Help?

Divorce counseling can be beneficial in many different ways. These include:

Providing a Safe Place for You and The Entire Family to Share Emotions

Through divorce counseling, the entire family can have a safe place to express their emotions. Having a neutral third party to encourage everyone to express their emotions can help everyone better understand where the others are coming from. This can be helpful for parents who may not have zeroed in on their children’s emotions. Through divorce counseling, they may begin to see things they were missing.

It also gives each spouse a place to express their emotions to begin the healing process. This can help them relate to each other better as they establish their new normal.

Helps Everyone Cope

Divorce can be extremely stressful and different to cope with. This can lead some people down unhealthy paths to deal with the stress. Through divorce counseling, people learn better ways to deal with this stress during or after their divorce.

Improves Communication

A breakdown in communication skills is often a contributing factor to divorce. Through the sessions, everyone learns how to speak to one another better instead of arguing or yelling. This is especially beneficial if children are involved. It’s important for parents to communicate pleasantly and effectively to make the divorce process easier for their children.

Helps You Go Through the Stages of Divorce

Divorce is often referred to as having different stages that include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Through counseling, people learn how to go through each stage and deal with the emotions that come with them.


What to Expect During Your First Session

If you decide to try separation counseling, you can expect your first session to consist of your therapist getting to know you. They’ll ask about your situation as well as what you hope to accomplish. You can also ask any questions as the therapist will likely talk about the next steps in the process. The same can be expected if your ex is joining you for the sessions.

Subsequent sessions will focus on both positive and negative emotions. Your therapist will likely talk about the reasons for divorce as well as what to expect going forward.

The Bottom Line

Divorce counseling can be a beneficial tool as people prepare for divorce or have trouble dealing with its effects. The emotions that go along with divorce can make it difficult to handle. Through divorce counseling, people learn how to deal with these emotions productively and how to maintain a civil relationship with their ex-spouse. This is especially important when children are involved. Counseling can be a useful tool for anyone seeking a neutral third party to help them navigate through the emotions and effects of divorce.